I'm afraid of losing control.
I loath the idea of my emotions just whisking me away in a an ocean were ill drown.
I'm afraid of not knowing our understanding an outcome. If i don't know or have an idea of how somethings going to end up, im scared. always. I'm scared of emotional pain, because i don't like me when i lose control of myself.
People who know me understand these fears, becuase they understand why i fear them. Some have expereinced me when i lose it, and some now how i choke and freeze up if i dont know what could happen. Im a human being influenced strongly by his surrondings. Ive tried hard to fix me, but i find it a task out of my reach. Its a huge weakness to let ones surrondings influence one's self.
I always try to keep self control, and its hard becuase of who i am, but i do try, and im sorry if anyone hates me becuase of it.
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Not knowing who you are is what you think your scared of but i think your just scared of being who you are, youi know who you are you just think other people wont like it so you cover4 it up. Youve covered it up so long that you just forgot.
ReplyDeletei agree with caelish, you have worried about you to much so you changed yourself to what you think others would want to see and now you are afraid of what you created.
ReplyDeleteBeing influenced by your surroundings is not a weakness, it is a strength: it means you are a part of the world, which means you are actually existing in it, a part of it. It is one of the purposes of life.
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